[Carol Vorderman] ..is heading up the Tories' maths taskforce with a brief to tackle "the fear of the subject". And fear-wise, she has plenty to address.I think Brian is getting a little desperate, this is not the stuff you would expect from the man who was named Columnist of The Year at The British Press Gazette Awards in 2000.
Take this sum: multiply the amount of dosh paid to send the Shadow Cabinet through Eton by the sum Derek Conway fiddled to put his sons through university.
Subtract the average age of the party's geriatric membership multiplied by how many of them want withdrawal from Europe and the return of hanging, divided by the number of dodgy offshore donors.
Then subtract the amount of new policies Cameron's got and multiply by the amount of talented MPs he's got to carry them through.
If you can make that add up, Carol, you're a genius.
Never mind Brian, soon you will be able to use your column to slag off the new Prime Minister, you'll find it's a lot more fun than kissing the old one's backside.